Thirty and a Half Excuses Page 55

“No! I can’t imagine my life without you.”

He kissed me gently, and then lifted his head. “I was so worried that Mason Deveraux was trying to take you away from me, I never once stopped to ask you what you wanted. No one can steal you from me unless you’re willing to go.”

“I don’t want to be with anyone else. I want to be with you.”

Fear filled his eyes. “You might not say that when I tell you what happened in Little Rock.”

I brushed my thumb along his lower lip. “I love you, Joe. Nothing’s going to change that. You and I both know I’m not proud of who I was before I met you, but you don’t hold that against me.”

A tiny smile appeared as his eyes turned glassy. “That’s entirely different, Rose. You were beaten down into believing you were nobody. You’ve become the person you were meant to be.”

“And you say Joe Simmons is different than Joe McAllister. Maybe Joe McAllister is who you’re meant to be.”

“It’s not that neat and tidy. I promised I’d tell you, and I want to do it now.”

Whatever Joe was going to tell me was about to change everything. I knew it deep in my marrow. I wasn’t ready for that yet. I needed to prepare myself.

I sat up. “I’m hungry.”‘

Joe rolled over and pushed up on one elbow. “What?”

“I didn’t get breakfast, and I’m starving. I’ll make us lunch.”

Joe’s eyes narrowed. “Since when do you back away from a problem?”

I got up and pulled a T-shirt and jeans out of a drawer. “The old me used to do it all the time.”

“Rose…”

I put on my bra and turned to face him. “Look, I know this is big, whatever it is, and I really am starving. I think I can handle it better if I’ve got some food in me. I promise, I’m not running. I’m preparing myself.”

He nodded, getting off the bed. “I’ll cook.”

I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him into a hug. “Not this time. I’ll cook, and I’ll tell you about what’s been going on around here. And when we’re done eating, you can tell me. Okay?”

His arms tightened around me. “Okay.”

“When do you have to go? Do you have time?”

“I have to leave in two hours. I have time.”

“Good. How about some spaghetti?”

“What?” His eyebrows rose in mock surprise. “No sandwiches?”

“You know darn good and well I can make things other than sandwiches.” I tried my best to sound playful, but his news hung over my head like a storm cloud. “I just don’t cook when it’s only for me.”

He turned serious. “I know.”

Maybe waiting was a bad idea.

I went into the kitchen and started a pot of water boiling, then searched for the ingredients to make sauce from scratch. I wasn’t sure I would have everything, but I did, mostly because Joe always went grocery shopping when he came to see me.

He walked into the kitchen and stood behind me, wrapping his arms around the front of my waist.

I looked up over my shoulder at him. “I don’t thank you often enough for all the grocery shopping you do. And cooking. Not to mention your help with the nursery. I appreciate everything you do for me, Joe.”

He spun me around to face him. “Hey, enough of that. I love doing things for you, just like you love doing things for me. Like when you take care of my laundry. And the sweet texts you send me. You have no idea how much I love getting those.”

I tried to squash my fear down. Joe had to be exaggerating when he said there was something terrible in his past. Maybe it was like my visions. They were a huge deal to me, but once everyone else got over the shock, the people who truly care about me accepted them. Maybe his secret would be like that.

But I knew it wouldn’t.

“Let me help.” He grabbed an onion and a knife. “I take it this is for the sauce?”

“Yeah.” I started to chop a green pepper, my hands shaking.

Joe leaned down and gave me a soft kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Tell me about Miss Dorothy.”

I filled him in on Mildred finding her body, Keith telling me he’d heard shouting from her house, and me telling Mason.

Joe sighed. “Mason’s right. There’s not a damn thing he can do with that.”

“There’s another death that might be related.” I told him about Miss Laura. “I overhead Mason asking the police to see if she had a connection to Jonah.”

He nodded. “That’s a good idea.”

I’d been throwing Mason’s name around a lot, but thankfully Joe didn’t seem upset.

“Tell me more about the break-in.”

I filled in the skimpy details I’d given him on Friday night.

“You need to be more careful. You can’t be running into dark alleys and backyards.”

“Joe, it’s my neighborhood. I’ve lived here all my life. It’s safe.” Or at least it used to be before Momma’s murder.

“Apparently, it’s not safe at all.” Fear filled his eyes…and guilt.

“It was nothing.”

“The hell it was. I should have been here with you.”

I put down the knife. “Joe, I’m fine.”

“Do you have any idea what could have happened to you? And I was over a hundred miles away with no way of knowing…”

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