She sighs. “Anyway, I love them, really I do, but there’s just too much crazy. I know my dad would’ve tried to find a way to let me pursue my passion for baking if I’d really pushed for it, but I needed the separation and I didn’t want to have to compromise. Besides, Maddy and Matthew are up to their elbows in the family biz, and I would really like to steer clear of that whole situation. Not to mention the Skylar situation.”

She’s opened the door to the topic, so I’m happy to walk right through it. Also, she’s right: This is totally like a horrible Jerry Springer episode. “You mentioned you and Matthew dated before?”

Blaire grips the steering wheel tightly and nods once. “He was sort of a rebound. I knew he wasn’t the right one, but he seemed like a decent in-between. I guess that sounds bad. I’d gotten out of a particularly toxic relationship and Matthew came along. He was safe and…very even.”

“Sounds boring.”

She laughs, which is good because this conversation has been a whole lot of heavy. “He was painfully boring. Is, not past tense. I’ve never met a more monochromatic human being in my life, apart from Maddy anyway. They are perfect for each other. All they want to do is work for the family because of all the perks and their ability to take selfies with famous people and travel all over America, while depriving themselves of carbs so they can be Insta-pretty.”

“Doesn’t sound like your type at all.” I don’t know what her type is, but boring and vapid sounds like the opposite of what she’d go for.

“He wasn’t. Like I said, he was a rebound. He was uncomplicated and he seemed to like me. I went out of town for a convention and by the time I came back, well, he and Maddy had hit it off.”

“How freaking long was the convention?”

She gives me a sidelong glance. “Five days.”

“She stole your boyfriend in five days?” Her family really is a bunch of jerks.

“Stole sounds harsh. Matthew and I were not destined for white picket fences, two-point-two children, and a purebred poodle. Besides, we’d only been seeing each other for a couple of months.”

“That’s still shitty.”

“What was shitty was when they ambushed me the second I got home and sat me down together to ask for my blessing to date.”

“And you obviously gave it.” I want to be angry that she folded, but clearly Matthew is a douche and so is Maddy, so it’s better they ended up together. Or at least that’s my assumption.

“Seemed pointless not to when it was obvious they planned to date regardless. I also got to be a bridesmaid at their wedding. On the upside, I’m well aware that Matthew is painfully average in every way.” She motions toward her crotch, as if it needed further explanation.

I don’t want to think about Blaire with that asshole. I don’t want to think about Blaire with anyone, which I realize should raise some serious red flags. However, I’m inclined to ignore those at the moment.

I decide to leave that information alone. For now it’s enough to know he’s barely adequate and vapid. “And what’s the deal with Skylar?”

“She’s always been a hot mess. She was young when the swap happened, so I honestly think it messed her up more than the rest of us. She doesn’t have any kind of moral compass at all, or direction, or independent thoughts. I actually sometimes wonder if she’s my half sister and not just my cousin.”

“That’s a mind fuck, right there.”

“My whole family is a mind fuck. And like I said, I love them and I know they love me even if they suck at showing it. I just want a normal life where I can do what I love without my family trying to railroad me and make all the decisions for me.”

“You’re incredible. You know that, right?”

“My family doesn’t think so.”

“No offense, but your family is fucked.”

She laughs. “This is very true. I knew I would fall short if I tried to work with them.”

“Fall short how? You’re amazingly talented.”

She chews her bottom lip for a moment. “I don’t share the same values as they do. They’re all about appearances and who they know, and that’s never really mattered to me. Our goals just don’t align. I want to do what I love, not necessarily what’s going to make me the most money. And maybe that’s naïve, or shortsighted or whatever, but it’s how I feel. So I avoided the potential disappointment by going in a completely different direction and now here I am, eking out a living, but doing it on my own.”

“They won’t help you?”

“My dad has tried to loan me money half a dozen times. He’s constantly offering to transfer funds into my account, but if I take their money, I also have to take their advice, and that is not something I want. Like when I wanted to buy the cupcake truck, my dad was there with a big old check, but it came with all kinds of stipulations, so I thanked him and told him I wanted to do it on my own and that’s what I did—well, with Paul’s help, anyway.”

This explains why Blaire is all about doing things her own way. “Do they get how hard you’re working?”

She shrugs. “Maybe? I’m not looking for their approval, or a pat on the back, though. I stopped doing that a long time ago when I realized their view of success and mine were so different.”

“My brothers are a lot like that. It’s always been about how much money they can make and how fast they can make it. For a while I was the same way, but it was making me miserable. No matter how hard I worked, my heart wasn’t really in it, so when they wanted to go out on their own, I had to reevaluate my own goals.”

“That makes sense.” She smiles and glances at me before focusing on the road again. “It seems like you really love the bar.”

“I do. It’s not going to make me rich, but it makes me a hell of a lot happier than working in finance ever did. And eventually I want to open a small brewery, so this is a great stepping stone.” It’s definitely something we have in common, loving what we do.

“A brewery? Really?”

“Yeah. It’s a passion project, but it’ll take time to make it happen.”

“Hmm, what about your brothers? Do they love what they do or do they love the money?”

“Both, I think, and they’re good at it. Finance is a natural fit for them, but it really never was for me.”

“So are you kind of a black sheep like me?”

“You’re not a black sheep. You’re an outlier, Blaire. My parents were always about doing what made us happy, as long as it wasn’t rotting our brains with garbage TV and hours of video gaming. But I guess in some ways I’m the black sheep. Both of my brothers have significant others and lucrative careers. They kind of fit the conventional stereotype of success: big house, nice cars, gorgeous wife or girlfriend—and my oldest brother, Daniel, is going to be a dad this year, so they’re on their way to the two kids and a dog scenario.”

“So you’re going to be an uncle. That’s exciting! I’m not sure if Maddy and Matthew will have kids or not, since Maddy is terrified of stretch marks.”

I laugh, but realize she’s serious. “That’s kind of…”