Closing my eyes, the tears come fast down my throbbing face. Everything hurts. My face, my body, my heart. God, my heart hurts most of all. I just want Jace. I want Nashville. I want to never see these people again. I don’t ever want to feel like I’m not even home, when that’s exactly where I’m supposed to be. No one should feel like this. Like the walls are closing in and you are alone. It just isn’t fair.

When my phone sounds with a notification, I think it’s a text. I pull my phone out, still holding my head up to keep the blood at bay. When I see that it’s a notification from Facebook, I plan to ignore it, but then I see that Jace has been tagged in a photo by Delanie Collins. I swallow hard, blinking away my tears as I slide the notification over and wait for my Facebook to load.

Then I wish I hadn’t.

Because staring back at me is a picture of the man I love, grinning, while his so-called ex-girlfriend kisses the side of his mouth.

Delanie Collins with Jace Sinclair: So good to be with this guy tonight. I’ve missed him more than I care to admit. Let the good times roll! #backtogether #timeapartisnothing #justlikebefore #boyfriendmaterial

As a new round of sobs burns in my chest, I can only shake my head.

Apparently, I don’t matter to anyone.

I don’t exist.

Because the love of my life looks pretty happy without me, while I’m sitting on my bathroom floor, sobbing and bleeding, not only from my nose but my heart.

All I can feel is empty.

Completely empty.

I didn’t want to come out.

I really didn’t.

But after being told to skip the game by Justin and then my mom fussing over me on the phone, I really had no choice but to get out of the house. Especially after watching my boys lose. It was a tough game, close one, one we should have won. But we didn’t and I blame it on Markus. He was sucking tonight, and he was another reason I came out. I’m worried about him, but instead of kicking it with my boy and my brother, Delanie is on me like white on rice.

Before, I wouldn’t have minded. Hell, I would have eaten it up, but I’m still torn up about Avery. I didn’t want to break up with her. That wasn’t my plan, not even kind of, but after the overload of information, I needed a minute to think how to proceed because I knew I couldn’t walk away. Not after all she admitted or how she cried. She didn’t want to lose me, but she threw me away.

It just doesn’t make sense.

I’ve checked my phone probably a billion times. I’ve started texts and deleted them. I’ve typed in her number but didn’t hit call. I just want her to talk to me, but I know she won’t. She truly believes I chose hockey over her, and I couldn’t be any madder at her family if I tried. They did this. They created this girl with the monster lack self-worth and sent her out into the world. I’m just happy I found her, because there’s no telling what some douche could have done to her if I hadn’t taken her for my own.

That’s right. She’s still mine.

I just need her to get her head out of her ass and realize that. Leaning on the bar, I take a pull of my beer, watching as Baylor and Jayden move on the dance floor. She’s drunk, like superdrunk, but then so am I. Which is what I came out for. To get lost in the bottle and not worry about what’s going on in my relationship. Not now at least. Later, I’ll face the music, and I just pray that our song isn’t over. Because I can’t go on without this girl.

I need her.

When a hand comes hard against my shoulder, I look over to see Markus. “You okay?” he asks and I shake my head, looking back at my phone. I told him everything last night when I came wobbling into the house, my leg aching from kicking the shit out of Avery’s door. He told me I should let her go, but no. I don’t care what anyone says. I love her and I’m going to be with her. She just has to get past her issues. When she does, I’ll be there. Or, I’ll break tomorrow and pester her until she talks to me. Hell, I might even fly to New Jersey.

Okay, wait, I need to tuck that crazy back in.

“Has she texted you?”

I shake my head once more. “Still radio silence.”

“Dude, really? That blows.”

“Yeah, it does. Probably as much as not hearing from Mekena does for you,” I say and he looks away, shaking his head. “Dude, I still can’t believe you slept with her sister. Did you get confused on who was who?”

He doesn’t even laugh, and I know he regrets it. Hell, he was just as torn up as I was this morning. He didn’t even eat…which is crazy. I know he likes to drink, but that’s so unlike him. He isn’t the kind to hurt someone. It’s weird, but when I asked why, all he could do was repeat the same thing, “It was a mistake. I said I was sorry, but she deserves better than that. Hence, why I’m staying far away.”

“Blows,” I say, holding my bottle up to his and he taps it.

“Another round of shots?”

I nod and we do three more. Leaning back in my seat, I suck in a deep breath as Markus leans against the bar, his eyes focused on where Delanie is dancing on the bar.

“Well, you’re a single man, and the way Delanie is checking you out, I think it means you’re getting laid tonight.”

“No way,” I slur, and hell, I hadn’t realized I was this drunk. I shake my head before taking a pull of my drink. “I think I’m gonna head home.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, I’m drunk.”

“Lightweight,” he calls and I laugh, flipping him off before heading to where Baylor and Jayden are.

“I’m out,” I yell and Jayden nods.

“You good?”

“Yeah, I’ll text you when I get to the house.”

“Cool,” he says as Baylor kisses me on the cheek. Flashing her a winning grin, I walk away. The grin on my face is gone within seconds. I’ve been acting as if everything is okay. I didn’t tell Jayden about Avery. I haven’t told anyone, and I won’t until I know for sure what is going on. As I head out the door, the cold air slices into my face and I shut my eyes. It feels so good.

Starting for the Bullies’ house, I drag my leg behind me, wobbling a little more than I was earlier because of the alcohol in my system. It doesn’t hurt, which is a plus, but my heart… Yeah, that hurts. Fucking girls. Breaking hearts and shit.

When someone falls into step beside me, I look over to see Delanie grinning at me. “What the hell? Leaving without me?”