“Troy?”

He still didn’t hear me. I touched him on the shoulder. He jumped up, eyes wide, as though ready to attack. When he saw it was me, confusion crossed his face for a split second, but it was quickly replaced with his ready smile.

“Hey, Mickey.”

I didn’t know what to think of this guy.

“Hey,” I said. “I wanted to talk to you.”

He took off the headphones and put the controller down.

“Have a seat.”

I sat in the gamer chair next to him. It felt odd, sitting in this dark room, the television providing the only light. On the screen, the game characters continued on as though nothing had happened. They ran and shot and dived and hid.

“So what’s up?” Troy asked.

“I need to ask you about Buck.”

That seemed to surprise him. “What about him?”

“You two are close, right?”

“Best friends.”

“Were you surprised when he moved away?”

“Surprised? I was more like shocked.” Troy turned toward me a little more. “Why?”

“It’s just odd,” I said.

“What is?”

“You were close to Buck, so maybe you didn’t see it. He put on a ton of size in the off-season.”

“He was lifting hard,” Troy said.

“That might be all it is, then.”

Troy’s eyes narrowed like his father’s had upstairs. “But you don’t think so?”

“I just wonder. He showed all the signs of steroid use. Increased size. He was nasty and aggressive. I heard he had a really good baseball season.”

“Great season,” Troy said. “He showed a lot of improvement.”

“Too much improvement?” I asked.

Troy looked troubled by something.

“What?” I said.

“You think Buck may have been taking steroids.”

“Yes.”

“But what would that have to do with me?”

“I don’t know. Maybe nothing.”

Troy looked away.

“What is it?” I asked.

“Nothing.”

“Troy, you asked for my help.”

“I know. But I didn’t want that help to come at the expense of a friend.”

“That’s not what I’m doing.”

“No?”

“I’m trying to find out the truth here,” I said. “That’s all. So what’s troubling you?”

Troy took a deep breath. “Buck felt threatened by you.”

I leaned back. “Me?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“Look, we treated you wrong. I told you that.”

“What does that have to do with Buck?”

Troy started fiddling with the controller in his hand. “I think one reason we gave you so much flack was because, well, we know how good a player you are.”

I said nothing.

“The five of us had been starters on the basketball team forever. But one of us was about to lose his starting position to you. It wouldn’t have been Brandon, the center, or me, the point guard—”

He didn’t finish the thought. I finished it for him.

“It would have been Buck.”

Troy nodded. “Think about it. You know all the pressure he was already under with his brother being a superstar, right?”

“Yes.”

“Now add you in the equation. It got to him. Bad. To lose your starting job in your last year . . .”

I saw where Troy was going with this. “So you think he took steroids.”

“I’m not saying that. He’s my friend. But at some point, Brandon and I wanted to lay off you. We knew that you could help us win. That’s all that really mattered to me.” He leaned closer to me. “But, see, I would still be a starter. Buck was the one on the fringe.”

We sat there, in the dark, and watched the video game characters run rampant.

“He hasn’t called me back,” Troy said.

“Buck?”

“Yeah. He sent me a few texts, but he won’t talk to me.”

“Why do you think that is?”

Troy shrugged. “I don’t know.”

My cell phone rang. It was Ema. I got myself out of the chair and headed over to a quiet corner. “Hello?”

“You found Jared?”

“Yeah,” I said. “Where are you?”

“We just got back home.”

“I’m on my way.”

Chapter 31

I told Ema everything about our meeting on Adiona Island with Jared Lowell.

She listened intently, as she always did. We were sitting in the kitchen of the enormous mansion she calls home. Niles, the family butler, was puttering around the house, but he knew better than to get in our way. Ema’s mom, the actress whose fan board had started this whole thing, was still in New York.

When I finished, Ema didn’t speak. She just sat at the kitchen table. Her hands were folded in front of her. She stared at them. I started to reach my hand across, but I stopped. Her body language was all wrong.

“Ema?” I said.

“He’s lying.”

I waited for her to say more. She kept her eyes on her hands. She started twisting the silver skull ring on her right hand around and around. Finally she said, “I want to show you something.”

She took out her smartphone and started playing with the buttons. I sat quietly. “I don’t like doing this,” she said.

“Doing what?”

“Showing you this e-mail. It’s the last one Jared sent me.”

“You don’t have to . . .”

“I know that. And, yeah, it’s really personal. That’s why I don’t really want to do it. But I need you to understand. Okay?”

“Yeah, okay.”

With a deep sigh, Ema handed me her phone. The cover was black with silver studs. The girl was consistent, I had to say that. She had blown up the screen so I couldn’t see the address or the top of the e-mail. I didn’t scroll. If she had wanted me to see the whole thing, she would have left it alone.

I can’t wait to see you. I can’t wait for this all to be over and to tell you what’s in my heart and how I’ve changed. You changed me, Ema. I have made so many mistakes and there is still one more thing to do, but once that’s over, I promise it will all be behind me. We will be together if you’ll accept me.

I looked up. “That’s it?”

“That’s all I want to show you.”